A distinctively cold clear morning.
Snow on the hills.

I got the fire revved up and talked to Shoshannah for a few minutes while she was getting her ‘dinner’ ready.
I am glad she has happily accepted her new way of eating, but I am not sure I could sit and eat salad at 7am!
I cleaned out the woodstove.
It was full of ash, Mahalia has been shoveling it out but she hadn’t realised the front panel should open to make the clean out easier.
I ratted around the fire and eventually found the tool needed to turn the bolt to open the ash vent, only to find it was rusted up and wouldn’t work.
I levered the top panel off instead and poked around with the poker and loosened the ash and then shoveled what I could out the front.
It was a bit tedious and rather dirty work.
It is times like this that I feel so damned helpless.
Tim always did all this sort of work, I have observed over the years so have an idea of what to do but I don’t have the brute strength to undo the stupid bolt.
I don’t even know where to find a tool to use instead of the rusty one or how to deal to the rust 
I am doing what I can, but it isn’t enough.
The wetback is still waiting to be fixed, and the fire is getting all rusty due to the water.
Anyway, I did what I could and left it ready for Mahalia to clean and light later.
I grabbed a towel and my laptop and padded gingerly along the wet cold deck to the spa.
Set the laptop up on the bbq and hopped in.
It was deliciously warm – Azzan hadn’t been near it so it wasn’t boiling!!
Lay back and watched the first part of another Catherine Cookson movie called ‘The Tide of Life‘.
I really enjoyed reading her books years ago and am thoroughly enjoying these movies.
Once I was out and dressed I finished packing.
Couldn’t get my head around what I would need in town so packed a heap more than I probably should have, but have no problem with room so easier to just chuck in extras.
Azzan was up and at it – bouncing through his chores, keen to help so we could leave.
He was energised by the fact we were going to town.
It is a good time to milk his energy and enthusiasm so I added a few jobs to keep him busy 😉
He actually took it upon himself to carry all the bags to the vehicle and load them in without being asked – progress 🙂
Shoshannah cleaned up the kitchen.
I tidied up my sewing to finish on my return.
Left Mahalia lists, gave her lots of hugs and we were out the door around 11am.
Seb was coming to pick her up as she is staying with him & Phoebe for the week and just coming home to do chores through the day.
I stopped in to drop a pumpkin pie off to Marah.
Kept my distance from her and Eden cuz I am still full of flu bugs.
We left the top of the hill around midday.
It was glorious up there.

It was a quiet first part of the trip.
Azzan was in the backseat wired into his iPod.
Shanni and I just talked intermittently.
I was feeling really yuck and a bit tearful.
About half an hour into the trip Shoshannah suggested we could have some music which I agreed to as long as it wasn’t too loud and raucous.
So she plugged her iPod into the car speakers.
I was amused cuz the first song that played was ‘If I die young‘ by Band Perry.
It was so in keeping with my mood
If I die young,
bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Send me away with the words of a love song
We arrived in town mid a afternoon on a Sunday.
I drove up the main street and was like, ‘what the heck?’
No parks. What’s going on here.
This is Sunday why are so many people on town?
Maybe it was a good day for the movies, or was it Farmers sale, or was it the first rain free day???
Whatever?
I had to drive round to Buxton to get a park.
Sent Shoshannah off to suss out shoes while Azzan and I stopped off at Starbucks for a drink for me and food for him.

Then we went to find Shoshannah, she was not over at No1 Shoe Warehouse.
They had a 3 for 2 sale on, suited be find today!
Azzan need some winter shoes so went looking with him and he very quickly found exactly what he wanted.
Neon green & white boots with laces that ‘you don’t do up Mum, that’s not how you wear these!’
Okay, fine, but if you trip up and break your neck don’t come running to me my boy who is growing up far to fast and knows exactly what is totes Mum!
Shoshannah found a few pairs, knew exactly what she was looking for and finally found them.
But in tan.
Guy called up Richmond and got a pair in black held for her so I will change them int he morning for her.
I bought a pair of slipper boots for me.
So we were all happy and I was very happy cuz my slippers were free 🙂
Then we dropped Shoshannah off at Katherine’s.
And headed off towards Richmond to meet Chrissy , Russell & Asher.
Azzan called them up and arranged to meet at Phillipa & Pat’s.
Got there to find them in their new abode – and it was very Piccadilly Circus.
Kids of all ages and stages, coming and going.
Parents coming to collect said kids etc etc.
We all sat around and socialised over sups of tea and carrot cake.
Then Azzan headed off to night church with Asher and family.
I stayed a bit longer.
Mandy, Mat & Macy and Jessica left and Phillipa started throwing food together for a late dinner.
We had lots to talk about.
I was really emotional and the tears just wouldn’t stay in check.
I had been really struggling to hold it all together while the crowds were milling.
Just not a good day really, feeling very down.
It’s hard enough dealing with my own grief but sometimes the weight of my children’s grief is just way too much to bear.
It was good to just have some one on one time with Phillipa and Pat.
We’ve been mates for so long now there isn;t much we can’t talk about.
The kids took their dinners into the movie room so we had plenty of time to just talk things through.
I finally had to leave as the evening was getting late and very cold outside.
Got to Andrea & Ross’s around 10pm.
Chatted with them for a wee while and then Andrea helped me unload my bags and I crashed out downstairs in my cave.