Considering how tired I was I still woke early.
I was able to fit in a quick spa between people coming and going.
It was a very tumultuous day.
Shoshannah went out mustering cattle with Anson & YC.
Sebastian was out on the water making the most of the calmer day.
Shan is kept busy in the garden.
Spent the morning searching for the agitator from the washing machine.
Was extremely frustrated as there were several loads piled up to do and dirty washing is my one fetish.
While looking I occupied myself with unpacking groceries, tidying up, and moving the Regulus etc.
Graham arrived round just before 11am and we sat and talked over a cuppa then cased the joint to see what needed to be done to finish the bathroom.
My emotions were pretty shaky and I was only holding them together through sheer intent.
The musterers arrived back and I announced that I was still looking for the agitator.
YC then went on a hunt – and found it!
It was lying in the bottom of the washing machine covered in dirty clothes – duh!
I had actually looked in there but obviously not far enough down.
I was then very thankfully able to begin the washing.
YC & Shan carried on with gardening for the rest of the day.
Azzan made pizzas.
The looked pretty good.
He had gotten some bacon out of the freezer and used whole uncut slices on them 🙂
Anson & Graham were still sitting talking over another cuppa so they had lunch with us.
Then Anson went up the hill to kill a beast.
He needed help cuz Seb was still out working on the boat.
So Shoshannah went and I volunteered Azzan to go to as he needed to get outside and do some physical.
He was totally unimpressed with the idea.
What followed was extremely dramatic.
He told me that there was no point in him going because it was all totally repulsive!
So I enlightened him on the fact that we are family, and we have to work together, and he likes to eat meat so he has to do his part in the supplying of it etc.
The others were waiting up at the top sheds for him and he proceeded to reduce me to a total emotional mess by arguing over what to wear on his feet.
There were two pairs of gumboots, both fitted him, but neither were his.
One was a tad small and the other a tad big – according to him.
In amongst all of that we also ‘agreed’ that we were both angry that Tim wasn’t here!
I completely lost it.
Every time I shut the door on him and said just to go, he would come back and argue some more.
I finally just collapsed in a heap in the living room and cried and cried, and just refused to talk to him.
He finally put on some boots and left.
Anson gave him a very abrupt tune up when he arrived and they went off quite happily.
I was in the kitchen and I looked up and saw the photo of Tim sitting holding me on the boat and I just cried some more, asking him ‘Why? Why did you leave me? I can’t do this on my own. I haven’t the excess energy to deal with a prepubescent boy who’s also hurting inside and is missing his Daddy so much.’
We both said stuff to each other that was hurtful, that we didn’t mean, but in amongst it we both were saying that we hated being here without Tim.
I was sitting in the study crying bucket loads more when Graham arrived.
I managed to pull myself together and went out to talk with him and Seb when he came ashore.
I asked them to help me with Azzan.
It is going to take our village to raise my younger ones.
They are my kids and they are still very much my responsibility, I am not ready to let them leave the nest or pass my responsibility as a parent over, but I do need help.
I finally managed to make my way through a list of phone calls I had been trying to do all day.
The septic tank at Waterfall Bay is seriously needing to be emptied.
But the company that normally does it has changed hands and they don’t know the road etc.
So there were many calls and much debating as to when and how they could come down.
Then I had to deal with the fireplace & insurance companies to sort out how and when they were going to fix the chimney at Waterfall.
There was debate as to who was paying for what and when they were actually going to do the job.
The fireplace cannot be used until the chimney is fixed and it is winter still so we need to get the job done asap as the electric heater I lent them in the meantime is costing heaps to use.
Seb had kick started off the process but we have been waiting for weeks for both things to get sorted and I was really over the mucking around so decided to boot them along to get some action.
Why is it never simple to get something done?
Graham went off and found some sandpaper and paint and the guys moved the new vanity into my bedroom.
Laid some old sheets down and it is now all ready for me to paint it.
He thinks it will be a therapeutic task for me to do 😉
I decided I had better make a real dinner so cut & skinned two pumpkins.
Boiled and mashed them.
Then put some baked potatoes and sausages in the oven.
Sliced up some coleslaw, then thought about dessert.
I have a container of Panacotta mix which I have not made yet.
Read the instructions which called for cream and milk.
I had no cream so thought I would experiment with using a can of coconut cream instead.
It was all very simple to make, I poured it into small bowls and left it on the bench expecting to be ready for tomorrow night.
We enjoyed our dinner – the baked potatoes I used were Nadine’s and were delicious.
Potato types really do matter I am finding!
Shoshannah found the panacotta was set already so we ate them.
The coconut cream mix was a great idea – worked well and tasted good.
I took mine off to the study and ate it while skyping with Jacqui in Perth.
She got the time difference a bit muddled so we didn’t get as long to talk as we had planned.
But it was really lovely to talk with my special friend – love you Jac – thanks for your support and love xxxx
Azzan came into say goodnight to me and apologized for his behavior.
He said he couldn’t promise that he wouldn’t misbehave again but he would try really hard not to.
At least he was being honest and I appreciated his ability to recognize his behavior and apologize for it.
I was so tired, wrung out emotionally that I literally fell into bed and was asleep by 9:30pm.